Therapy Resource

IMPROVE the Moment: Coping When You Cannot Fix the Problem

Seven Skills for Making Unbearable Moments More Bearable

DBTSkill CardFree Resource

Some distressing situations do not have immediate solutions. When you cannot change what is happening, the IMPROVE skills from Dialectical Behavior Therapy offer ways to make the moment more tolerable. Unlike distraction-based strategies (such as ACCEPTS), IMPROVE skills work by changing your internal experience of the moment itself—shifting your relationship to the pain rather than redirecting attention away from it. Research supports each of these strategies as effective in reducing acute emotional suffering (Neacsiu et al., 2022).

I
Imagery

Use your imagination to create a mental sanctuary. Visualize a peaceful scene in vivid sensory detail—what you see, hear, smell, and feel. Alternatively, imagine the best possible resolution to your current difficulty. Guided imagery has been shown to reduce physiological stress markers.

Picture yourself sitting on a quiet beach at sunset, feeling warm sand and hearing gentle waves. Or visualize a difficult conversation going better than expected.

M
Meaning

Search for meaning, purpose, or a lesson within your suffering. Finding meaning does not minimize your pain; it places it within a larger context that can sustain you. Post-traumatic growth research shows that meaning-making is a key factor in long-term resilience.

Ask yourself: What can this experience teach me? How might it help me support someone else who faces something similar in the future?

P
Prayer or Contemplation

Connect with something larger than yourself through prayer, meditation, or quiet contemplation. This can mean communicating with a higher power, consulting your own inner wisdom, or simply sitting in stillness. The goal is to release the need to control the uncontrollable.

Recite a meaningful prayer, repeat a personal mantra, practice a brief loving-kindness meditation, or list five things you are grateful for.

R
Relaxation

Deliberately activate your body's parasympathetic (calming) nervous system through relaxation techniques. When the body relaxes, the mind often follows. Choose a technique and practice it consistently so it becomes accessible during crises.

Try diaphragmatic breathing (inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 6), progressive muscle relaxation, gentle stretching, or a brief body scan.

O
One Thing in the Moment

Narrow your focus to a single, simple activity and give it your full attention. When you are overwhelmed, trying to manage everything at once amplifies distress. Doing one thing mindfully creates a sense of control and presence.

Wash the dishes slowly and deliberately, fold laundry one piece at a time, count backward from 100, or trace the outline of your hand on paper.

V
Vacation

Take a brief mental or physical break from your stressor. This is not avoidance—it is a strategic pause to recharge so you can return to the situation with more resources. Even a few minutes of genuine rest can shift your perspective.

Take a 15-minute walk, call a friend who makes you laugh, read a chapter of a novel, or sit outside with a warm drink.

E
Encouragement

Become your own coach by offering yourself words of support and validation. Choose phrases that feel genuine and motivating—not dismissive of your pain. Self-encouragement strengthens self-efficacy and counters hopelessness.

"I have gotten through hard things before and I can get through this." "This feeling will not last forever." "I am doing the best I can right now."

Practice Section

Think of a current or recent distressing situation that does not have a quick fix. For each IMPROVE skill, write down how you could apply it to help yourself through that specific situation.

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